I hate the fact that i have so many things to say but as soon as my finger touch the keyboard, i seem to be loss at words.
I tried to busy myself so that i won't be reminded of you. Isn't that what you want? For me to enjoy my study life? I tried that. I did. But when i ran out of things to be focused on, my mind immediately remind me of you.
one year and half seems like a short amount of time. But we both know what we went through the whole year. I am used to having you by my side. I used to talk to you whenever i had problems with my classmates and friends. You're my boyfriend, and you're also a person who i look up to when i needed an advice and motivation. You always seem to have a nice things to say. Even when i knew you wouldn't be much of a help, the existence of you, right there with me, is already enough to make me feel better.
There's tons of little things that reminded me of you. Like when my lecturers said that he had a newborn baby boy, it reminded me of you. Of how you said that we should have a baby a bit later because you have no idea how to hold that innocent tiny human.
My parents took me to aeon shah alam yesterday and i can't described how hard i tried not to burst out crying in front of them because we always went there when you came to visit me here. and each and every time i tried taking a selfie of myself, there's a quick split second where i thought that i'm going to send them to you.
I never really had that confidence in me, which i believe you know how insecure i felt towards all the girls around me. But i always send those ugly weird selfies to you just because i know you'll accept me. I felt comfortable around you. And it took me so long to feel that way.
So thank you. For making me feel like i am accepted by someone. Even if it is for a short amount of time.
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